Having a Good Friend

Having a Good Friend

Having a good friend while serving as a pastor’s wife can be a difficult challenge. I’ve struggled with the concept of having a close friend. I have had a couple of good friends in the church, but the relationship lacked the intimacy I was seeking. Since some of my deepest needs and struggles centered around the church, there were many things that would not have been appropriate for me to share with her. I’ve experienced many lonely seasons in ministry, which is hard to explain when it seems I’m constantly surrounded by people. I’ve learned that it is very important for me to have at least one good friend. My best friend is someone that doesn’t attend my church. As a matter of fact, she lives several hours away. I don’t see her very often, sometimes we go for a year without spending time face to face. When I think about this relationship, there are three things that come to mind that make it valuable. First, she helps hold me accountable. She is a fantastic accountability partner because she is also a pastor’s wife. She understands the pressures as well as the delights of ministry. She can be firm and caring while she helps keep my actions and emotions in check. Second, I can confide in her. It is key that she is not in our congregation because when I share with her, even when I mention names, she can be objective. I can bare my soul and know that the information will go no further than her ears. Lastly, I count on her for encouragement. Since she has many similar experiences to my own, I can tap into her wisdom from lessons learned. She can provide perspective when I can’t see through my trial. She also rejoices with me when I celebrate victories. I thank the Lord for the relationship that I stumbled upon with this dear friend. She makes me a better person and a better pastor’s wife. If you don’t have such a friend, I would suggest you search for someone that can hold you accountable, that can keep a confidence and that can encourage you when needed. Bring it before the Lord in prayer and be sensitive to His leading . . . your best friend might end up being someone you wouldn’t have chosen on first thought. The relationship will be a blessing to both of you.

Priscilla

 

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