I had the answers to fix everything.

Melodys pier

“Unless the Lord builds the house, the workers labor in vain.”  Psalm 127:1

2002 was a monumental year.  My husband and I had both just graduated from college and we were getting married just a few months after graduation.   He was offered a job as an assistant pastor and I was offered a part-time paid position to be the director of children’s ministries.
There were no other ministry opportunities open for us and this church was a familiar one for me.  I had bible quizzed at this church, my first piano teacher was the current organist, and even the parsonage we were going to reside in was a piano lesson site.  Goodness, my parents even lived 15 minutes down the road!

Clearly, everything with lining up and THIS had to be, it WAS God’s will for us.

My brain was fresh and full of great ideas on how to revamp and make an awesome children’s ministry.  I had the answers to fix everything.   I was doing exactly what I paid thousands & thousands of dollars to learn about and achieve.
Fast forward 2 years…I was burned out, ministry weary, 8 months pregnant with our first child and majorly discouraged.  How could this have happened?  We were doing the work of the Lord. How was it possible to be so fresh into ministry and already ready for a permanent vacation?
Just a few months before our son arrived,  my husband and I decided to go on a spiritual retreat before parenthood hit in full force.  We went to a beautiful resort for some answers about what was going wrong.
An early morning walk revealed a breathtakingly gorgeous bay.  I sat down in a secluded spot with my journal, bible, & a pen and began to listen for God’s voice.  In the distance, I spied a small wooden pier that was tempting me to walk out upon it.  There was a small sign that was posted upon the entry of the wooden pier that said, “Danger, enter at your own risk!” This pier had been damaged from a recent storm.  After further study, I noticed it was beginning to collapse a bit at the end.

The Lord revealed to me that in MY ministry, I had not seen the warning sign posted on the pier.  In our youthful eagerness to get into ministry, we did not clearly hear a “Yes, this is the way…walk in it.” God revealed to me that I had been relying on myself to “do the work” and hadn’t been asking the question, “should I be doing this work?”

God then turned my attention to a large rock pier further down the bay.  These rocks were HUGE and heavy, unmoving.  A storm comes and these babies stay put! God impressed on my heart that HE needed to be the builder of my “piers”.
I don’t believe I made a mistake in choosing the ministry I was in, I chose my plan and my will instead of trusting in God’s.  I needed to be dependant upon God’s blessing and not my own devices. The best thought out plan fails unless God blesses it with success.
As I walked upon the rock pier reaching the end, I knelt down upon the last rock.  In my tearful prayer of surrender, I asked the Lord to be the only Master Builder.  He promised that the next house would be built by HIM for me, and that it would be blessed.


Leave a Reply